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day two seventy three. autopilot.

day two seventy three. autopilot.

do you ever have those days where your brain almost goes on autopilot while your working (or driving or doing whatever) and you come to and realize, ‘I don’t really remember the last few minutes at all.. but I was still successfully working and getting things done (or somehow amazingly managing to not have a car accident)? it’s such a strange feeling isn’t it?

my job requires me to be at my desk pretty much 90% of the time. sometimes I sit down to work and quickly forget everything going on around me and just focus on what’s in front of me. and it’s like I go blank or something.. I start working and I just get really focused. so focused that I forget the time, I forget to eat.. until something, a phone or a noise outside, interrupts my train of thought and I look down and think ‘whoa, where did the time go.’

that’s what today felt like. my brain was on autopilot working for me without needing my full attention.. I think people who do smilier tasks day in and day out probably know what I’m talking about. like muscle memory or something..? I think it’s interesting.

273/365

不可饶恕 The Unforgiven I

Maybe this one can’t be a photo, only just a kind of mood of mine. This was my self-portrait taken ten years ago. I just want to use this one to salute Metallica’s 《The Unforgiven》!in some sense,once this song saved me.
—————————————————————————————
New blood joins this earth 新的生命降生到这个世界。
And quikly he’s subdued 他很快地被驯服了。
Through constant pained disgrace 通过没完没了痛苦的羞辱。
The young boy learns their rules 年轻人学会了他们的规则。
With time the child draws in 随着时间流逝。
This whipping boy done wrong 这个替罪羊做错了事情。
Deprived of all his thoughts 他被剥夺了所有的思想。
The young man struggles on and on 这个年轻人挣扎着。
he’s known 他被告知。
A vow unto his own 他自己发誓。
That never from this day 从今天开始。
His will they’ll take away 任何人都不能带走他的意志。

What I’ve felt 我所曾感受的。
What I’ve known 我所曾知道的。
Never shined through in what I’ve shown 都没有揭示出真正的我。
Never be 从来没有。
Never see 从未看见。
Won’t see what might have been 不可能看到任何曾经可能发生的事。
What I’ve felt 我曾经所感受的。
What I’ve known 我曾经所知道的。
Never shined through in what I’ve shown 都没有揭示出真正的我。
Never free 从未有自由。
Never me 从未有自我。
So I dub the unforgiven 所以我称之为不可饶恕。

They dedicate their lives 他们牺牲他们的生命。
To running all of his 来管理他的一切。
He tries to please them all 他试图取悦他们所有人。
This bitter man he is 他是一个痛苦的人。
Throughout his life the same 他的一生都是一样的。
He’s battled constantly 他不断地战斗着。
This fight he cannot win 那个他永远也赢不了的斗争。
A tired man they see no longer cares 一个疲惫的、没人在意的人。
The old man then prepares 这个老头准备着。
To die regretfully 遗憾地死去。
That old man here is me 那个老头就是我。

What I’ve felt 我所曾感受的。
What I’ve known 我所曾知道的。
Never shined through in what I’ve shown 都没有揭示出真正的我。
Never be 从来没有。
Never see 从未看见。
Won’t see what might have been 不可能看到任何曾经可能发生的事。
What I’ve felt 我曾经所感受的。
What I’ve known 我曾经所知道的。
Never shined through in what I’ve shown 都没有揭示出真正的我。
Never free 从未有自由。
Never me 从未有自我。
So I dub the unforgiven 所以我称之为不可饶恕。

Never free 从未有自由。
Never me 从未有自我。
So I dub the unforgiven 所以我称之为不可饶恕。

You labeled me 你给我称号。
I’ll label you 我将回你一个称号。
So I dub the unforgiven 所以我称之为不可饶恕。

Never free 从未有自由。
Never me 从未有自我。
So I dub the unforgiven 所以我称之为不可饶恕。